A Letter to Winter: A Summer Shift

The beautiful illustration of the two of us is by Laura Knopp.

Winter,

I am not sure if I could ever articulate the beautiful child that I see when I look into your eyes. In the last week I haven't been spending as much time with you, yet I still feel like you are with me all the time. I feel so lucky to be able to walk downstairs and work on my creative projects all while being able to hear your sweet voice and laugh as you play with the nanny. This gift of summer has really been so good for the soul, for both mine and yours. You are developing a relationship with other people, learning to trust them and welcoming them into your world.

While you play, I am able to spend the time I need to think about my next transition in life, both professionally and as a future mother of two. When I am down in the basement everything I do to better myself and our family's future always has your best interest in mind. So I want you to remember that even while Mommy is on her computer a piece of her heart is always with you.

If you ever become a working mother you will know the constant push-and-pull that comes from leaving your family to go to work. I felt this emotion most days when I would leave the house, often before you were even up, to head to my job as a school psychologist. While I think there is so much value in having a career, following your passions and helping others, I couldn't deny the longing I felt in my heart to be with you. And now that summer is here I am full of gratitude and it shines from me as bright as the summer sun.

You are growing up right in front of my eyes. I get so emotional when you ask me to rock you like a baby before bed because you are so much bigger than you were just a few months ago, but you will ALWAYS be my baby. I wish desperately that there was a pause button in life. I would push it right now and spend the entire day just holding you, playing with your hair and rocking and singing to you.

This time together, just you, me, Daddy and Rio has been the best time of my entire life. Thank you, sweet one, for being my daughter. You have no idea how much I love you.

To the luna and back, kid. To the moon and back.

Your Mommy