I know I am a wee bit late on getting this blog post live, but I did want the chance to write about what the first three months of Lennon’s life was like and here it is. Below is a little round up of common questions I get asked and my thoughts on each topic!
Read MoreWinter Gates,
These last few weeks with your brother or sister in my belly have been some of the most magical times of my entire life. It’s not that we’ve done anything extraordinary…no big outings, no huge plans, no big surprises. Yet, the every day routine from bath time to bed time to playing in the yard has been some of the most memorable moments of my life.
Read MoreI have stayed quiet about my career as a school psychologist for several reasons, but the main reason is I just wasn't ready to share about it because it's been a lot for me to process.
Since becoming a psychologist in the public sector I have watched myself give more than I have, lost faith in the systems that we call public education, special education, and social services and, when it boils down to it, I have experienced depersonalization, compassion fatigue, secondary trauma and burnout.
Read MoreWinter,
I am not sure if I could ever articulate the beautiful child that I see when I look into your eyes. In the last week I haven't been spending as much time with you, yet I still feel like you are with me all the time. I feel so lucky to be able to walk downstairs and work on my creative projects all while being able to hear your sweet voice and laugh as you play with the nanny. This gift of summer has really been so good for the soul, for both mine and yours. You are developing a relationship with other people, learning to trust them and welcoming them into your world.
Read MoreOur 20-week appointment is coming up quickly. I have had a few DMs asking if I'd share about our decision to keep baby number two's gender a surprise. People often think we are nuts for not finding out. It literally drives my family members nuts. Especially my poor Mom.
I wrote about our decision to keep Winter's gender a surprise in her birth story (here). The story explains that when we were pregnant with Winter Perry had asked me to honor the most romantic request of our marriage thus far, the wish to wait to find out the gender until birth. You see, he was really wanting to find a way to connect to the baby. He commented on how amazing it was that I got to bond with the baby from conception and he too wanted to feel a part of that magic. He stated that he thought it would be super romantic if he were the one who presented our son or daughter, and it was such a sweet and sincere request, how could I possibly say no?
Read MoreI love the smell of the crisp autumn air, the leaves changing and blowing in the wind, and last but not least, all the fall dresses. This dress is from Vida Moulin, a boutique from my hometime, Phoenix. I wore it this past weekend to a wedding, and it made for the BEST dancing dress. Perry and I had a blast dancing, and I loved how the light weight of this dress made it easy for me to twirl around and salsa dance.
Read MoreWhen I envisioned this post, I thought the words that would accompany the video of us from Hawaii were going to be light-hearted, blithesome and effortlessly joyful. I, however, experienced something much deeper after watching this video.
How can three seconds completely transform your entire way of being? I must have watched this video a thousand times, and I can’t stop crying when it hits the 50-53 seconds mark. The way her hands touch both of our faces at the same time, it’s like she knows.
Read MoreWhen I wrote this post, my view consisted of the beach, waves, and people enjoying the sunshine and beautiful palm trees. There was absolutely no reason to complain. Except, I keep sitting here thinking what could have been and romanticizing the video clip I had imagined in my mind. You see, about a month ago, I looked over at Winter and something came over me. This emotion that I had never felt before, the longing of another baby. Before, when people would ask, I would cringe at the thought of another child. The idea of it all made me feel sick to my stomach and full of fear. Postpartum depression hit my family like a banshee out of hell and I could not, would not, risk putting myself or my husband through that again. Fear would win in my mind, and for the longest time, I thought our family size of three could be complete.
Read MoreWinter is getting to the age where she doesn't always want to be in front of the camera. It takes so much work to constantly build content, answer emails, and connect with others. While my blog is mainly centered around my experience as a mother, I need to respect the wants and needs of my child and keep her best interest in the forefront of my heart. Now, Brittany and I NEVER make Winter do anything that she doesn't want to do. However, it does get stressful at times when we have, say, 4 products or concepts to shoot in one day. And while I am not complaining, because I would rather have too much work than none, it's a delicate balance to be a motherhood blogger. It's a huge decision to not only document your life as an adult but to also capture your child's upbringing on a weekly basis. I have more to say about this on a later date.
Read MorePerry teases me because I tend to be at tad bit indecisive. One minute I talk about cashing in on our house and moving to Argentina and the next I am discussing my plans to pop the top in our current home and stay here forever. While I think my indecisiveness drives my husband crazy, I know that it can be good when it comes to consumerism, especially when it comes to buying big ticket items. Being indecisive makes you push the pause button and really think about your choices. So actually, Perry should be thanking me because I am virtually saving us money any time I can’t decide on what to buy, haha.
Read MoreEvery day that I leave for work, I wonder what Winter is doing, what it must be like for Perry to get to work from home and if I am doing the right thing for my family. I’ve opened up before (here), that while I would love to stay home, it’s not a reality for me right now (dang those student loans). Being a working mother means that I have limited time with Winter and the last thing I want to do on the weekends is run errands with a toddler in tow.
Read MoreWinter,
Today, you are a year and a half years old. I am having a hard time starting this letter because I have so much to say, but I am not entirely sure I have the vocabulary to convey it.
I remember writing you a letter the day before you were born (you can read it, here). I was so eager to meet you, little one. When I wrote it, I wasn’t feeling apprehensive about the labor or delivery. I remember the words just pouring out of me. While I typed, I experienced this cool, calm, and collected ease and energy pass through my body. Now, here you are a year and a half later, and that easy-going, serene-like energy is passing through me again as I am typing this today.
Read MoreNegative self-talk surrounds me. I am not immune to it but I am fighting to oppose it viciously. I look into the mirror and see flaws, things I want to chance, things that make me feel less than. But do I dare verbalize them, no? I have a duty you see. My duty is to expose the tiny ears around me that love will always win. Love for yourself, your body, your beauty and even more, all your perceived short comings. My daughter grew inside of me and now I have this beautiful baby, this tiny beacon of hope that is relying on me to help her to fill it up with light, positivity and self-worth.
Read MoreThere have been far too many blog posts featuring Winter and I playing on my bed. I can't complain, the cuddles while looking outside to our very own snow globe have been amazing this season. Yet, Perry and I can't seem to stop talking about our plans for this summer.
Read MoreFrom painting, to learning piano, and now with writing, I am always trying to push myself creatively. When I became pregnant with Winter, I began posting to Instagram frequently and it opened up a whole new world. Being one of the first out of my friends in Colorado to get pregnant, it was refreshing to connect and talk to other mamas, while honing my newfound joy and creative endeavor, photography.
Read MoreBefore I had Winter, my New Year’s resolutions leaned on the side of being cliché’. I wanted to gain more muscle, become more flexible, be better about what I ate, etc. It wasn’t that I didn’t have depth to my intentions before kids, it’s just that my intentions run deeper now than they did before because I know that my goals affect her too. I want Winter to grow up in a household where her parents are happy, healthy and well-balanced. So even though I still want to workout more and eat better foods, my real resolution lies in the depths of my heart.
Read MoreI am slowly starting to put the life vest back on. The life vest that I always knew was there but was maybe too proud or too weak to grab for. For the last year, I have set unrealistic expectations for myself. When I am at work, I give 150%; I pumped three times a day while I was nursing, which meant I never got a lunch or any other break and I often felt like I was failing my colleagues because I couldn’t stay late for meetings. At home, I gave 300%; I took care of Winter, I grocery shopped, I tried to cook, I stayed up late to clean the house, worked on my blog, texted my family and friends, and responded to comments on Instagram all while trying my best to stay positive and enthusiastic.
Read MoreWinter’s nursery reveal is finally here! We had such an overwhelming move back in August (moving with a baby makes things exceptionally more difficult) and it feels so good to finally have at least one room where the closets aren’t busting at the seams and where everything has found its natural place.
Read MoreWelcome to #TinyStyles. A new blog series that will highlight some of my favorite small shops.
Read MoreI had the honor of being in one of my best friend’s wedding a few weekends ago. The day after the wedding, I had coffee with the bride and our other dear friend. I started telling them about how my postpartum funk had begun to show its ugly face again once I started back up to work in August. I keep thinking I am past it, but then stress hits and bam, I am completely brought to my knees by my inability to cope with it all. My friends asked me (more like begged me) to start putting myself first so I could get a grasp on things and when they inquired what helped me, I responded “to write”.
Read More
